Faith Park

Faith Park is a remarkable place, full of wonders for all to see. Why we’ve got everything from crosses, to charms, from dried up husks, to incense and all the works!

Yes sir, in here you’ll find everything your soul desires, unless of course you’re in the #enlightenment era  on your way to Nirvana. In that case we have everything and anything you’d need to keep away any material desires. Budda himself would admit to being proud of you once you’re out!

But of course we ain’t narrow minded at all. Perhaps you’re more on the African side, your worship is less temple and more practice, in the fields and with the people. We know that well enough so we’ll give you every tool that you need.

Or if you’re a first timer of the first nations well, every shop in here has every piece of herb, animal hide and bone that you may need for any and all of your days of worship.

Now sir we of course mean no disrespect, if ya got any complaints let our chief inspector know they’ll make sure to write it down to give a proper talk to our people! So we may change and adjust to give yous what you need for the worshippiest of days!

Or maybe you’re amongst the esoteric kind, ya find anything here that offends ya? Good! We’ve got grimoires, black candles and as much virgin blood as you might need, the anime convention is right next door!

Ha, I joke, I joke of course, we ain’t never hurt a soul and never will! We’re all about salvation, ascension, rapture, nirvana and or the eternal neverending journey of that tiny little thing that we call the human soul sir. Be it one or nine parts, be it split in two or come at your darkest time we have everything you will ever need to feel complete, saved and in eternal harmony.

So come to Faith Park, to find everything your soul has ever or will ever crave, find yourself lost in eternal bliss and never, ever, ever, suffer again for a day of your life, and beyond!

Faith Park, its Heaven on earth!

 

• A new one! I swear I'm not on any pseudo western religion theme kick, I just got the words Faith and Park on a writing prompt rolling of the dice and seemed easy enough lol. I really wanted to convey both the corporative ridiculousness of it all with a western centric perspective on religion that reduces it to "Christianity in another flavor". And hey, this time there's a graphic! Because I felt it needed a visual element that was as jarring as the text lmao. Enjoy!